Keepin on Keepin on!

I've been going on short walks at the Governors Mansion every couple of days or so (working around my schedule). I went out and got some hiking shoes today. The tennis shoes I'd be ramblin' around in weren't really supporting my gimpy right ankle the way I need. My ankle is prone to rolling sometimes so I figured some mid-rise boots would be a good plan for me. I ended up just springing for some Cabela's waterproof boots. They felt awesome and the guy that was helping me out does a lot of hiking, and he recommended those right off the bat. I'm gonna try and get some time tomorrow to go out and try em out. Here they are.

I'm really starting to love the alone time I get when I go out on my walks. I mean, yeah, at first it was awesome, but I felt odd being alone, not bringing a friend with me. But now, I really enjoy it, and I would venture to say that I prefer being alone. I was walking and stopped and reflected on how lovely the nature around me was and I almost wanted to cry, standing there in the middle of a forest. And its nice having something that I'm doing just for me. But I worry sometimes that this is just a phase for me. I go through a lot of random hobbies and then slowly fall out of them. I really don't want to just give up on this, but I'm afraid that I'll never get to the AT. I worry that once I get my undergrad I'm going to have to jump right into a job, or an internship or something. By the end of my education I'll have spent thousands and thousands of dollars on preparing myself for a career, but my mom said once "Do everything you want to do now, because life settles into a daily grind and its very hard to get out of it". I don't know. It's just this awareness of how lofty a goal this is that intimidates me. I have never hiked or backpacked or primitive camped in my life, and yet I am planning on hiking over 2,000 miles? I just worry that I'm setting myself up for failure.

But I can do this! I just have to keep a positive attitude and remember that if this were easy I wouldn't want to do it. Just have to take the next step and roll on into the next moment.

Alone Time

Bah. The last couple days were kinda tiring mentally and emotionally. Finally found time earlier today to go out on a hike. Same trail as last time, but I didn't go very long. It was pretty hot, a little over 90 degrees, so I was sweating up a storm. It felt nice to go out and have some time to myself though. It really cleared my head to be out on the trails with no noise pollution or anything. Thats one of the things I'm really looking forward to about the AT; This is going to be something big that I have done myself, and I will be alone (potentially) so if I grow, its because of my own reflection and experiences. I really just want to have a defining experience in my life, something that my kids and grandkids can be proud of me for, or at least want to tell the story. I've mentioned my AT intentions to a lot of people so I feel more obligated to stick with it as a matter of pride, haha. Kind of a dumb way to motivate yourself, but if my hamartia is pride then I'm going to use it to my advantage.